He waited in the place where I park
Suddenly the sky came flowing down
Someone left the Jake out in the rain
And I don’t think I can take it
Because it took so long to groom him
And he looks like he will never be dry again, oh no!
*Based on the chorus of MacArthur Park. A song written by American singer-songwriter Jimmy Webb that was recorded first in 1967 by Irish actor and singer Richard Harris.
Dawn
Caturday in the dark
No sun, its warmth short in supply
Caturday in the dark
We were longing for some heat like July
Kitties freezing, we were sneezing
Jake was feeling all right
Romping in the cold
Cloudy and dark all day
Spunk was so warm and comfy, he didn’t change positions after I changed his calming collar. Genda watched from behind.
Gwendolyn and Loki
Glenda upstairs. Gwendolyn downstairs. Loki in the middle.
Silver and Spunk socked in by the weather
At sunset, we got some color despite the cloud cover.
Since we’ve adopted Jake, I spend a lot of time carrying little green bags of dog poop around with me when we are out on walks. The old song “Little Green Bag” by the Dutch band George Baker Selection came to mind one day, so I wrote parody lyrics about those little green bags of dog poop. I recorded the parody, and Jake and I made the above music video.
Silver: “It’s your own fault for adopting a dog. Pathetic poopy paparazzo!”
Gwendolyn: “Whoa! You really pick up that crap? At least with us kitties, you use a slotted scoop to clean the kitty litter.”
Spunk: “Well, pathetic poopy paparazzo. Your doggedness has done you in!”
While I’m off work for the holidays, Jake misses his ride to and from the office every day. He goes outside and sits by my car, waiting to go to work. When we don’t go to the office, he acts disappointed, so I’ve started taking Jake for a ride in the car every day while I’m on vacation. Today we came across a cluck of cranes.
Pre-dawn
Well, do you know why I came here tonight?
To buy a board, I could cut in broad daylight
I was so scared that I stood there impaired
Caught up in their marketing lair
Christmas to the left of me
Halloween to the right
There I was, stuck in the middle with no clue
Yes, I was stuck in the middle. Couldn’t move!
Got Cheez?
Dusk on the Rio Grande pretending to be a lake.
I Am A Man is one of my favorite parodies. It’s such a perfect description of a man put to the music of I Am Women by Helen Reddy. Paul Shanklin is one of my inspirations for parodies along with Weird Al Yankovic. Lyrics are at the bottom of the post.
The toad that came in from the rain.
We have jugs, fountains, and bowls of water for the cats. Now, we have to leave a cup of water out for the jumping spiders.
I Am A Man
Lyrics by Paul Shanklin
Music by Ray Burton
Pull my finger, hear me roar
Like ten thousand times before
And you know that when I listen, I pretend
‘Cause I’ve heard it all before
Pick your socks up off the floor
But you know that I’ll just throw them down again
Oh, yes, I’m right, but it’s wisdom born with pain
Yes, I paid the price; just look how much I’ve gained
If I have to, I can eat anything
I am wrong (wrong)
I am insensitive (insensitive)
I’m a man
You can try, but never break me
‘Cause my mama never made me
Do nothin’ ’round the house but lick the bowl
I’ve got bigger things to ponder
I’m not the one who’s supposed to launder
Where are more batteries for my remote?
Whoa, yes, I’m right
But it’s wisdom born with pain
Yes, I’ll pay the price
But I get to watch the game
If I have to
I can fix anything
I am wrong (wrong)
I am insensitive ((insensitive)
I’m a man
Don’t you forget it, baby
I am man; watch me mow
See me swing just like a pro
And I still like Lucky Charms with eggs and ham
But she’s still a little slow
With a long, long way to go
How can I make your mama understand?
Oh, yes, I’m right
Or else I know who to blame
Yes, I’ve paid the price
But look how much I’ve gained
If I have to
I can sleep anywhere
I am wrong (wrong)
Sure, I’m insensitive (Neanderthal)
I’m a man
I’m a man
That’s right
Don’t you forget it
I’m gonna have fun tonight
I’m headed down to the bowling alley with Tony
And we’re not gonna come back ’til 3 a.m.
You have a trailer all to yourself
Come on, Bubba, let’s go
What do you mean your wife wants you to stay home?
Are you some kind of wimp? Or what?
Lyrics by Timothy Price. Music by Elton John. The lyrics are at the bottom of the post.
An Old Man’s Blues is my rewrite of Elton John’s Screw You (Young Man’s Blues), which was on the flip side of the Goodbye Yellow Brick Road single (45rpm) released in 1973. I bought the Goodbye Yellow Brick Road single in 1974 before I could afford to buy the album. I ended up playing the B-side more than the A-side because I identified with Screw You (Young Man’s Blues) when I was a sophomore in high school. I was a misfit weirdo, and I was teased a lot. One of the many reasons I dropped out of high school when I was 16.
I was working on a cover of Screw You (Young Man’s Blues) when I decided I needed to update the lyrics from 1970s England to 2024 New Mexico. Plus, the way I rewrote the bridge addresses some of the recent strange encounters in the blogosphere.
One of the images I did for the song art for An Old Man’s Blues.
More bloomin’ blooms
An Old Man’s Blues
Lyrics by Timothy Price
Music by Elton John
Now that I’m old, I don’t have much fun
I can’t see or hear or talk to anyone
My back’s a pain. There is so much strife
I’m gotta clean the kitty litter, oh what a life
I say screw you
I ain’t got nothing to choose
I live on my laptop
Cause there’s nothing else I can do
Screw you, I ain’t got nothin’ to choose
I’m livin’ on my laptop cause there’s nothin’ else I can do
I was workin’ downtown when I got in a fight
I was beaten in an alley out in broad daylight
The cops could care less; they were downright scary
Sayin’ “Make my day!” Just like Dirty Harry
They said, “Screw you!”
Oh, you stupid old fool
You work downtown
You get beaten by a Tool
Screw you! Oh, you stupid old fool
You work downtown
You get beaten by a Tool
See, there’s femmes who get laid for being slaves
Femmes who get paid for being laid
There’s femmes behind screen names who prey with delight
Those femmes they are liars; they are as dark as the night
They lie, scratch, and whine, trying to make a dime
And all of them say, “Get out my way! Screw you!”
I’ve stared at a screen from seven ’til nine
The wear on my eyes nearly drove me blind
Tryin’ to make riches with nothing to share
Gettin’ hell from my staff, but I didn’t care
They said, “Screw you!”
That’s all we’re gonna do
We’re not existing for someone like you
Screw you! This is all we’re gonna do
We’re not existing for someone like you
Screw you! Screw you!
(Screw you, screw you, screw you, screw you, screw you, screw you, screw you, screw you)
Glenda (foreground), and Gwendolyn (background) are in the catio looking for birthday birds. They were born on July 4, 2020.
Gwendolyn: “Three Years! That makes me like 28 years old!”
Gwendolyn (looking at the camera) and Glenda napping together on the deck.
Glenda reflecting
Spunk wrote a Heavy Metal parody called Death To All But Kitties for Glenda and Gwendolyn for their 3rd birthday. The lyrics are brutal, so dog lovers might not take well to Spunk’s parody. All of the cats dislike dogs, but Gwendolyn despises dogs more than anything. The first time Tristan brought Jake to the house, Gwendoly injured her spine trying to escape the monster dog that invaded her space. Jake only be’d a dog, but he really scared Gwendolyn. She lost the use of her legs for a week from her spinal injury. We were really worried about her. When she has gotten careless jumping on things or playing rough with the other kitties, she has reinjured her spine and again lost mobility in her hind legs. She still high-tails it when Tristan brings the dogs over, but she hasn’t injured herself in over a year.
Death To All But Kitties
Lyrics by Spunk Kitty
Music by Steel Panther
All right!
Meow!
Down with stupid dogs, I’m spraying on the wall
They look like shaggy retards licking on their balls
Pluto is a fool, and so is Scooby doo
Sniffing each other’s butts and rolling in their poo
They lick their butts, and people’s faces with their grody tongues
Everybody shout, “Kitties rule! Cats are fun!”
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
Death to all Dalmatians. Did you get their gist?
They’re whizzing on the fires, getting burnt to a crisp
Wearing black polka dots, really stupid critters
Eating Tootsie Rolls that we bury in our litter
Where are the Stray Cats? And Sylvester, too?
We strut around and act weird; that’s what kitties do
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
Kill those dumb old doggies who have a pedigree
They can hump on your leg all night; you won’t disagree
Kill sassy Lassie leaving Timmy in the well
Kill Old Yeller too. Been done? Oh, what the hell?
Screw Lady and the Tramp, death to Red Dog Blue
They can do the doggie shag. Wouldn’t that be cool?
Frankenweenie is a drag, Snoopy, don’t come home
Let ’em fight it out in a thunder dome
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
Death to all but kitties
It’s been a while since I recorded a new parody. Laurie suggested I write a parody of Elton John’s Benny And The Jets and call it Timmy And The Cats. So I did. And here it is.
Timmy and the Cats
Music by Eton John
Parody Lyrics by Timothy Price
Hey Cats, Beaker shakes loose feathers
You’re scratching on something
That was known as my black leathers
You’ll kill a big fat mouse tonight, leaving it around
I’m gonna hear kitties purring, hissing, solid scratching sound
So, Glenda and Loki, have you seen them yet?
Ooh, but they’re so sprawled out
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Oh, they’re so weird and they’re colorful
Timmy keeps their kitty litter clean
They’re like electric boobs, they’re shocking you
Squeezed through a ringer on a washing machine, oh oh oooh
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Hey Cats, even though you are wage-less
You’re all so whiney, but Timmy makes it painless
You’ll all survive, Timmy will make you something out of wood
Where you fight with our parrots out on the sheets
To find who’s bad and who’s good
So Glenda and Loki, have you seen them yet?
Ooh, but they’re so sprawled out
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Oh, they’re so weird and they’re colorful
Timmy keeps their kitty litter clean
They’re like electric boobs, they’re shocking you
Squeezed through a ringer on a washing machine, oh oh oooh
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Say, Glenda and Loki, have you seen them yet?
Ooh, but they’re so sprawled out
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Oh, they’re so weird and they’re colorful
Timmy keeps their kitty litter clean
They’re like electric boobs, they’re shocking you
Squeezed through a ringer on a washing machine, oh oh whoa
T-T-T-Timmy and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae, Timmae, Timmae Timmae and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae, Timmae, Timmae and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae, Timmae, Timmae Timmae, Timmae and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae, Timmae, Timmae and the Cats
Timmae, Timmae, Timmae, Timmae and the Cats
Timmae
A parody I made about VR and our Virtual World using DEVO’s Beautiful World.
Virtual World
By Timothy Price
Music by DEVO
It’s a virtual world we live in
A Tweet filled kind of place
Virtual people everywhere
All covered by AppleCare
Games they like to play
In a virtual world
Our virtual world
It’s a virtual world
Undo
See-through
PU
It’s a proverbial time to be here
A slap on the behind
Deep fake porn is everywhere
You see they have no hair
Shaved it all away
It’s a proverbial place
Unretreavable space
It’s a virtual place
from you
Me too
F-you
Hey!
What do you want to be?
Hey you with the goggles on
Watching VR of an old King Kong
Hey Hey
It’s a virtual world we live in
A Tweet filled kind of place
Virtual people everywhere
All covered by AppleCare
Games they like to play
In a virtual world
Our virtual world
It’s a virtual world
Undo
See-through
PU
Oh can’t you see (It’s a virtual world)
For you (It’s a virtual world)
For you (It’s a virtual world)
For you (It’s a virtual world)
Not me (It’s a virtual world)
It’s a virtual world
It’s a virtual world
It’s a virtual world
It’s a virtual, virtual world
It’s a virtual, virtual world
It’s a virtual, virtual world
It’s a virtual, virtual world
Quotes and Videos used in Virtual World Video:
Bible Quote:
Proverbs 29, Complete Jewish Bible
“29 He who remains stiffnecked after much rebuke
will be suddenly and incurably broken.
2 When the righteous flourish, the people rejoice;
but when the wicked are in power, the people groan.
3 Whoever loves wisdom brings joy to his father,
but a patron of prostitutes wastes his wealth.
4 A king gives stability to a country by justice,
but one who overtaxes it brings it to ruin.
5 A person who flatters his neighbor
spreads a net for his own steps.”
Assassinations in Virtual Reality
https://youtu.be/htYd5HfImXU
King Kong (1933) – Beauty Killed the Beast Scene (10/10) | Movieclips
https://youtu.be/MMNICLfHE3M
Jeana Turner Gets An Emotionally Liberating Ty-Over | America’s Next Top Model
https://youtu.be/IpRSyVcHu-k
How To Shave Your Legs Like A Pro
https://youtu.be/dzpsJQN4o-Y
A New Booty Slapping Champion Has Arrived
https://youtu.be/M5hfMytDWnA
Jasmine Asia | Fearless Femininity | Agent Provocateur Autumn Winter 2020
https://youtu.be/j0TLnKE1uNQ
Hundreds march in #MeToo rally
https://youtu.be/gVPlL8Py1-c
Kid Rock – We The People (Official Video)
https://youtu.be/kyFnLqJx-uU
Why These Cows Are Wearing VR Glasses
https://youtu.be/_e3Vvvk-rjY
Twitter automatic scrolling in Web Interface
https://youtu.be/_cWKg3Pp1Mk
est VR 360 Video (Virtual Reality)
https://youtu.be/QKm-SOOMC4c
Halo Infinite | Campaign Gameplay Premiere – 8 Minute Demo
https://youtu.be/HZtc5-syeAk
Want to fly inside the firework? 360°, 4К aerial video
https://youtu.be/8bc0jE4igAc
Reacting to GODZILLA vs SIREN HEAD.. (IN REAL LIFE)
https://youtu.be/90yw5k76gcQ
woman smelling a bad smell
https://youtu.be/RPSLxOwwlSQ
How to protect your iPhone with AppleCare+ – Apple Support
https://youtu.be/DdjjRMhsQQU
Trapped in the Metaverse: Here’s What 24 Hours in VR Feels Like | WSJ
https://youtu.be/rtLTZUaMSDQ
Ok, Who is CodeMiko?
https://youtu.be/CsQjxEd-gsw
Sadly, the cranes are gone. They flew north for spring and summer. I did find some flowers blooming.
Off Center & Not Even 